Go for the Life Partner, Not the Prom Date

When you think about it, dating is weird. We plan lots of special events with a special person with the goal of spending time with them just hanging out. Unless you go to a lot of restaurants, movies and other events out in the world, dating sets us up to create a false impression with our intended dating target.

Physical Attractions

One of the ways we get ourselves in trouble is that we completely focus on appearance. It is important that you develop a physical attraction to your mate. That being said, the first impression factor can really get in the way of finding a loving, supportive life partner.

First of all, if appearance is the first thing that matters to you, be aware that you may well meet a more attractive person at some point in the future. Additionally, your extremely attractive partner may be a target for others looking for a date, or something more.

If you do not have a loyal, loving connection, your partner may well leave you in search of someone more attractive. Additionally, if you were drawn to someone because their clothing, hair, car, apartment, makeup, or nails are always top of the line, be aware that those factors do not come cheap. A lifetime with Barbie or Ken always on display will get old quickly. Arrange for a casual outing and be honest about setting the bar low.

Honesty and Loyalty

If you want a strong relationship with a life partner, pay attention to communication. There may be days when you just feel hateful. Having a partner who can hang in there until you are approachable is key.

There may be days when you want to get a little wild and try something different in bed. The pressure to be sexually adventurous can be extreme. If you want to explore, a partner that you can talk to with as little embarrassment as possible will greatly benefit your relationship and your level of intimacy.

At the end of the day, good sex and using appropriately sex toys is about great communication. If you and your current partner do not stay together, you want to know that they will be careful with your most intimate secrets. If you cannot trust them with that information, keep looking.

Keep Talking

Finding someone who falls into the range of being moderately attractive is considered to be a very good first step in finding a relationship and deep connection. To that end, if you find someone who is visually appealing, the next step is to build a healthy communication style that allows both of you to be completely honest. This can mean a tough conversation about anything from family challenges to housework to getting romantically adventurous.

Share Your Favorite Activities

If you love to hike, camp, or watch fireworks displays, invite your dating partner, and show off your inner child. Invite them to go to yard sales with you or bring them with on your monthly volunteering trip to the Humane Society.

This doesn’t mean that you and your chosen partner shouldn’t enjoy a fancy night out in one another’s company. However, the pressure to always be on display will limit your joy and ability to relax and celebrate that special person.

Let the person you want to see more of see you at your most vulnerable earlier rather than later. Spending time hanging out, getting dirty, eating junk food, or cuddling a puppy is a wonderful way to connect with another human being. Friendship and love can live together in an extremely healthy relationship, and once that foundation has been set, you can be confident in your partner.